Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Randomize
