Texts From Last Night

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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.

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  (985): I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call. http://tfl.nu/xapr
  Replies (15) Good night (4732) Bad night (725)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY

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  (210): every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY http://tfl.nu/204o
  Replies (19) Good night (6756) Bad night (1133)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.

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  (201): Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it. http://tfl.nu/rf1i
  Replies (4) Good night (2938) Bad night (1665)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.

  (1-606): View more from Kentucky

  Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.

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  (606): I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me. (1-606): Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons. http://tfl.nu/drp9
  Replies (4) Good night (4536) Bad night (1577)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.

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  (540): Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza. http://tfl.nu/9mae
  Replies (11) Good night (865) Bad night (4042)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.

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  (973): That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this. http://tfl.nu/9yd7
  Replies (10) Good night (2089) Bad night (1018)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.

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  (214): Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours. http://tfl.nu/p1m2
  Replies (13) Good night (2756) Bad night (738)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.

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  (240): she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes. http://tfl.nu/9p5u
  Replies (10) Good night (1423) Bad night (939)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.

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  (732): I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that. http://tfl.nu/uw0f
  Replies (1) Good night (1459) Bad night (601)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis

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  (360): Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis http://tfl.nu/354f
  Replies (2) Good night (989) Bad night (747)
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  (916): View more from California

  1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.

  (707): View more from California

  *roof

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  (916): 1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor. (707): *roof http://tfl.nu/ph25
  Replies (6) Good night (1881) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.

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  (250): Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket. http://tfl.nu/g0f2
  Replies (3) Good night (516) Bad night (930)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?

  (512): View more from Texas

  Won't she run out of nose eventually?

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  (254): She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually? (512): Won't she run out of nose eventually? http://tfl.nu/f0dc
  Replies (3) Good night (629) Bad night (718)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.

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  (413): I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life. http://tfl.nu/tpxd
  Replies (1) Good night (516) Bad night (165)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.

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  (631): Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night. http://tfl.nu/33bp
  Replies (2) Good night (308) Bad night (138)

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