umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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