K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
