He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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