I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
