The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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