is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
