Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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