im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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