just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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