**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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