just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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