I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
