Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
