Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize