my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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