he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Randomize
