You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
