Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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