yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
