It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
