I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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