his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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