I like my sex mixed with concussions.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
