I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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