I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
