So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
