OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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