thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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