I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
