So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
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Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
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I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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