so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He kissed a someone with a penis
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
