Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
