I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
