you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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