Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo http://tfl.nu/r8i0
  Replies (9) Good night (777) Bad night (2395)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now. http://tfl.nu/38zc
  Replies (19) Good night (6928) Bad night (1409)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all http://tfl.nu/t0uz
  Replies (11) Good night (3163) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave. http://tfl.nu/vplg
  Replies (21) Good night (803) Bad night (5657)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways http://tfl.nu/wwmk
  Replies (0) Good night (1351) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (979): He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic http://tfl.nu/8ocy
  Replies (10) Good night (2471) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan http://tfl.nu/sol0
  Replies (19) Good night (1909) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud. http://tfl.nu/94cv
  Replies (5) Good night (879) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van. http://tfl.nu/2zw8
  Replies (4) Good night (619) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life. http://tfl.nu/9g4v
  Replies (2) Good night (345) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent http://tfl.nu/4dji
  Replies (8) Good night (1249) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people. http://tfl.nu/iqjk
  Replies (8) Good night (419) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha. http://tfl.nu/kiqc
  Replies (1) Good night (486) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days. http://tfl.nu/aq3h
  Replies (3) Good night (913) Bad night (213)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest" http://tfl.nu/n3kn
  Replies (0) Good night (293) Bad night (280)

Randomize