i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize