But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
