Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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