I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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