Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
