Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize