whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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