I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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