You're my little dorito
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
