A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car