people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Panties = found
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
