whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
