Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
