went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
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I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
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She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
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