fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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