Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
